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Old 01-10-2008
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My collection of racing quotes....

If this is off topic, then move it. Otherwise, I could not decide where to put it... here you go guys...

* Aerodynamics are for people who cannot build engines. (Enzo Ferrari)
* All I had to do is keep turning left! (George Robson - Winner of the 1946 Indy 500)
* Anyone can drive a fast car, few can drive a car fast.
* Auto racing, bull fighting, and mountain climbing are the only real sports...
all the others are games. (Jim Dietz)
* Calling upon my years of experience, I froze at the controls. (Stirling Moss)
* The cost of racing hasn't increased in 30 years. Back then, it took everything you had. And it still does.
* Fast cars drag race, fast drivers road race.
* Faster, faster, faster, until the thrill of speed overcomes the fear of death... (Hunter Thompson)
* Friends don't let friends apex early.
* Horsepower has this tendency to break things. If you're not breaking anything you're not going fast enough.
* I always ask God for blessings of protection on that person in the car, for blessings of protection on the crew as they're attending to the car on pit road. And I always ask for peace of mind for the wife. (Dale Beaver - NASCAR chaplain)
* I don't know driving in another way which isn't risky. Each one has to improve himself. Each driver has its limit. My limit is a little bit further than other's. (Ayrton Senna)
* I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
* I feel safe when I'm on the racetrack, I really do. I know that I'm surrounded by the best drivers in the world. That's something you can't say when you're driving down the interstate. (Sterling Marlin)
* I feel safer on a racetrack than I do on Houston's freeways. (A. J. Foyt)
* I live my life a quarter mile at a time.
* I was doing fine until about mid-corner when I ran out of talent.
* If I had all the money I'd spent on cars...I'd spend it all on cars.
* If you can't run with the big dogs, Stay on the porch
* If you're going to lead, then lead.
If you're going to follow, get the hell out of my way!
* In the old days drivers were fat and tires were skinny.
* It has been said that motor racing shares in common with sex the distinction of being one of the most popular, most maligned and least understood of human activities.
* It is amazing how may drivers, even at the Formula One Level, think that the brakes are for slowing the car down. (Mario Andretti)
* It is not always possible to be the best, but it is always possible to improve your own performance. (Jackie Stewart)
* It's basically the same, just darker. (Alan Kulwicki - on racing Saturday nights as opposed to Sunday afternoons)
* Life may begin at 30, but it doesn't get real interesting until about 150.
* Never drive faster then your guardian angel can fly.
* Never run out of real estate, traction and ideas at the same time.
* The number of laps remaining is always one more than the amount of fuel left in the car.
* The number of times you get hit in a pileup is directly proportional to the number of times you said "I think it will go ok today".
* The older I get, the faster I was.
* On the other side of fear there is freedom!
* Once you've raced, you never forget it...and you never get over it. (Richard Childress)
* Oversteer is when your ass hits the wall, Understeer is when your face hits the wall!
* Oversteer scares passengers, understeer scares drivers.
* A part never breaks during a test session, only during a race. And the part you need will be the one you left at the shop.
* The price for men in motion is the occasional collision... (Carroll Smith)
* Race car drivers love the fast lane.
* Race cars are neither beautiful nor ugly. They become beautiful when they win. (Enzo Ferrari)
* Racing is living, everything else is just waiting.
* Racing is the process of turning money into noise.
* Racing's less of a sport these days than a commercial break doing 150 mph. (Peter Dunne)
* The shortest way between two points is a straight line...what's the fun in that?
* Straights are for fast cars. Turns are for fast drivers.
* A 10-car pileup never happens behind you!
* There's no secret. You just press the accelerator to the floor and steer left. (Bill Vukovich)
* To achieve anything in this game you must be prepare to dabble in the boundary of disaster. (Sterling Moss)
* To finish first, first you have to finish
* What sets these - and all - racers apart from less daredevilish mortals is their complete lack of fear and their joy of doing something on the edge. They love to speed because it is dangerous. (Peter Golenback)
* What's behind you doesn't matter. (Enzo Ferrai)
* When I look fast, I'm not smooth and I am going slowly. And when I look slow, I am smooth and going fast. (Alain Prost)
* When you win a race your on top that day, so take it for what its worth, have a good time and party, cause the next day when you get out of bed, the meter goes back to zero again. (Bobby Allison)
* Winners win races. Champions make it look easy.
* Wrecks are going to happen in this business, that's just a risk of the sport. If you can't keep from worrying about it, then you're in the wrong line of work. (Coo Coo Marlin)
* You will never know the feeling of a driver when winning a race. The helmet hides feelings that cannot be understood. (Ayrton Senna)
* You win some, you lose some, you wreck some. (Dale Earnhardt)

1. Don't brake until you see God, just don't meet him
2. Winning by 1/2", is still winning
3. Its more fun to have more horsepower then talent
4. If I caught you, you are slower
5. And I quote this months car Craft "unlike car racing, golf, football, and soccer only require one ball"
6. If Americans were real racers, they would race DOWN Pikes Peak

#3 Buddy Baker speaking of an ill-handling Cup car at Darlington when TNN did the race: "I wouldn't get outta' the electric chair to drive that thing".

#2 Kyle Petty describing Bobby Hillen's point of view after Hillen creamed him during a minor spin-out at Talladega: "Here comes that blind boy again".

#1 Felix Sabates talking about fast race cars(and you have to apply your best Cuban accent when you're reading this): "If money is what makes these cars fast, my cars otta be going 400 miles an hour!".


Typical saying for a squid at a local circle track - "He hit everything but the snackbar"

Buddy Baker - Bustin' a timin' chain is like throwin' a brick at a clock

Buddy Baker - Passin' Earnhardt is like trying to take a bone out of a Pit Bulls mouth


MY favorite!
"If you can leave two black stripes from the exit of one corner to the braking zone of the next, you finally enough horsepower". Mark Donohue
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RIP to my great friends and fellow racers... Sid and Wally, you guys are sorely missed by my family and I every day....
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  #2  
Old 01-10-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Dude,

Does Mel know you have this much time on your hands?

Great list.

You overlooked some choice Skippy quotes such as:

"You don't have to help, just don't get in the way!" JP

"Anyone can drive a perfect racecar, it takes a REAL man to drive this shitbox"
Captain Wally

"This is a logistical nightmare" Bruce MacInnes

The list goes on and on.
Nick-Nickism's would be a book in itself....

One of my favorite Non-Skippy quotes is from Dorsey's kid brother Tony Schroeder after wadding up his Datsun 510 at Ponca City Oklahoma...

"I never lost it, I just ran outta room to save it...."

Good Stuff,
SD
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  #3  
Old 01-10-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by StevieDe View Post
Dude,

Does Mel know you have this much time on your hands?
SD
You are kidding right? When I come in to work with her here, she sits me down with a bottle of water, riddlin, and this computer and says " I'll pick you up at 6pm, DON'T break anything"!!!
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  #4  
Old 01-10-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Skippy Quotes.... just because Stevie brought it up.

" were you born stupid or did you go to school for it ? " Duck Waddle

" can't fix stupid can you boy ?" Duck told to me!

" Did you want to crash? Or just want to ignore my feedback?" Duck to a crashed out customer.

" If your gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough" Duck

" the car was stuck like glue until I crashed" Unknown 3 day customer at VIR"

"Is this a blipping track" Casey Neil , Red Bull Shootout...

My favorite that I can remember. I was coaching Murray Marden at the 24 hour and it is raining, cold, miserable, he's been in the car for 2 hours I bet by now. It's pitch black dark and 3 am. He's getting blown off the road in the banking by prototypes left and right. The radio has been silent now for an hour. I think he's come unplugged. Then, with over 30 people on the TRG crew listening, Mur breaks it out...... " what's everybody's problem, we're all gonna get to the same place at the same time here"... then silence...
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RIP to my great friends and fellow racers... Sid and Wally, you guys are sorely missed by my family and I every day....

Last edited by Mopar92; 01-10-2008 at 07:29 PM.
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  #5  
Old 01-10-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

More just in....

"Parts don't break. We break them" - Carroll Smith

"Mr. Bentley - He builds fast trucks." - E. Bugatti

"It was very fast in a certain kind of turn. Unfortunately, none of the tracks had that kind of turn."



"Turbochargers are for people who can't build engines."---Keith Duckworth, Cosworth Engines

"The guys that are winning are the guys standing on the biggest pile of parts!" Carrol Smith

"Why worry about death, it'll come sooner or later." Jim Dunn
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  #6  
Old 01-10-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

"It doesn't matter what gear you're in when you hit the wall." Duck Waddle
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Understear is when they hit the Armco with the front of the car; overstear, on the other hand, is when they hit the Armco with the rear of the car.
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  #7  
Old 01-10-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

I'd forgotted about the late downshifter quote from Duck... good one George...
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  #8  
Old 01-10-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

"I got behind on my steering." Richard Petty after hitting the wall.


OLDMAN
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  #9  
Old 01-11-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

My favorite is Duck's quote below...
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You draw 'em a picture and they eat the crayons... (Duck Waddle commenting on the creative ways some people interpret driving instruction.)
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  #10  
Old 01-11-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Scene:

Todd Snyder, addressing the drivers meeting the day after major track carnage at his last Skippy Race weekend before coming out of retirement:

"You guys are all driving like idiots, but you know what? I don't care! Why? Because I'm going racing."
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Old 01-11-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Keith:

I hope you were cutting and pasting from some other resource! To think you might have written all of that by your lonesome...Definitely must be off season!
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  #12  
Old 01-12-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Duke, seems you found one of my best sources for signatures. These may be in your list, too many to read there buddy - some racing, some just good quotes

"Who do you think you are, Stirling Moss?"
-A British police officer stopping Stirling Moss (76) for speeding.
Sir Stirling relates that the officer had difficulty believing him.

Never trade the thrills of living for the security of existence.

If you think you donít need a helmet, you probably donít.

If you wait, all that happens is you get older.

If you canít get it going with bungee cords and electricianís tape, itís serious.

Only a Biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window.

Never run out of real estate, traction and ideas at the same time.

"Doug - you didn't know those sidepods could hold that much water did you"? Stevie De
.
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  #13  
Old 01-12-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

I copied a lot from a list and a lot from individual emails. I was sick with the flu and I had some time.... It was fun....
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  #14  
Old 01-13-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

A personal favorite...

"The Well of Knowledge overflows for those who seek it and is shallow for those who deny its existence!"
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Old 01-14-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

I just read this thread for the first time. One correction. The forth quote, "auto Racing Bull, Fighting . . ." is originally attributable to Ernest Hemmingway.
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Old 01-14-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Duck was bitching to me after he got an oil change and the mechanic put too much oil back in and the oil was foaming. I said "Well, it would be a bit messy, but can you just take out the oil plug for a couple seconds and drain some out?"

He goes, "Son, have you ever tried to shove a wet noodle up a wildcat's ass?"
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Old 01-14-2008
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Thumbs up Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by dlippert View Post
I just read this thread for the first time. One correction. The forth quote, "auto Racing Bull, Fighting . . ." is originally attributable to Ernest Hemmingway.
THANK YOU! I was waiting for someone else to catch that.
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Old 01-18-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

You Forgot the Nick Nick Classic

" Remember, you have to work up to too much entry speed."


Another Duckism to my wife at her three day school

Duck- "why can't you threshold brake, get those tires smokin'

Sue Y- Because, I'm going to die in this car !!!

Duck- Hell, everybody dies, Ya just don't know when!!

CCLLASSIC !!

Last edited by Yarab; 01-18-2008 at 08:59 AM.
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  #19  
Old 01-18-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Ron, edit that.... hurry..... That was NOT a Steven Von Debrecht quote! That's a Duck quote.
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  #20  
Old 01-18-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopar92 View Post
Ron, edit that.... hurry..... That was NOT a Steven Von Debrecht quote! That's a NICK NICK quote.
That's a NICK NICK deal.
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  #21  
Old 01-18-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopar92 View Post
Ron, edit that.... hurry..... That was NOT a Steven Von Debrecht quote! That's a Duck quote.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopar92 View Post
That's a NICK NICK deal.
uhh, Keith, ol' pal..... are you talking to yourself again? Not that there's anything wrong with that.
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Old 01-18-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopar92 View Post
That's a NICK NICK deal.
Keith, hows it going????
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  #23  
Old 01-18-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopar92 View Post
Keith, hows it going????

Good man, in Homestead now for race weekend...
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  #24  
Old 01-19-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....



why I am I picturing you sitting in a corner posting on Juicy between mumblypeg feats?
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Old 01-19-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Want to know some "fast facts"? Tom Brown grew up, put his kids threw school, and paid off his house playing mumbly peg. Kasey " my main man " Kuhlman started funding me for traing in mumbly peg. Kasey said one night at KC's, " Keith, I can see you are unreal and have a serious talent at Mumbly Peg. I think if we can get you funded and Tom coaching you, you could be the middle Tennessee state champion." So, I am off to Bulgaria to get formal training in Mumbly Peg School of Genius. Thanks to Kasey who had changed my life by showing me a hidden talent. Sadly, only Jagermeister can provide me the skill level needed to battle in world competition.... Keith, go to bed... stop talking on the buttons....
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Old 01-20-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Slowhands View Post
uhh, Keith, ol' pal..... are you talking to yourself again? Not that there's anything wrong with that.
My mom once me it was ok to talk to yourself. It's even ok to answer yourself back but you know you are in trouble when you're talking to yourself and suddenly stop to say, "Huh?"
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Old 01-20-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Ha... That's good stuff.
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  #28  
Old 01-21-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

One of my favorites is JP "less brake, more gas".

During a lead follow session at Watkins, JP and I are in the pits waiting in the cars for someone to be cleared off the track. JP comes over the radio and says "Marc, I would like to see less brake and more gas in turns one... ah... the bus stop, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 and ah 11. OK?

This should pretty much sum up my driving.

Awesome list, Keith.

Thanks, Marc.
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Old 01-21-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Marc...and as race results have shown, you picked it all up rather quickly!
JP
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Old 01-21-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Stop, I'm blushing.

Not only a great quote but it was great advice. I wish you could have seen me laughing in my helmet when you rattled off every corner on the track.

I am assuming I will see you in Daytona this weekend. I don't get in until late Friday.

Until then,

Marc
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Old 01-29-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Just this weekend at the Rolex--

Matt Varsha, shrugging, on a challenging stint:

"Well, the brakes weren't working, but it wasn't their fault."
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Old 01-29-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Slowhands View Post
"Well, the brakes weren't working, but it wasn't their fault."
Brilliant! Kinda reminds me of the Nascar tire terminology on an understeering car "Them dogs wont hunt"
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  #33  
Old 01-29-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

How about this gem, from my engineer Steve Bunkhall, during the Rolex 24 this weekend:

(After removing me from the car after 30 minutes in the rain in the middle of the night):

"Well, it took me that long to realize that I had taken out the pro and put you in just in time for it to start pouring rain at 4am, so I figured it was time for a driver change."
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  #34  
Old 01-29-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

And this classic from JP, on the radio somewhere in Iowa,

I said "On the GAS, not on the GRASS."
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  #35  
Old 02-01-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

These are some that I call Earwoodisms...
You NEVER want to be accused of having a tiny "blip"

All highway off-ramps should be banked to 45 degrees and have a sign at the end saying bes time of day


My favorite way to pass someone is with 150 more HP on a straightaway.
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  #36  
Old 02-02-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

I hate that I havn't seen duck yet this year. I think I need someone to tell me to "Take my skirt off!"
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  #37  
Old 02-02-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by jlowe View Post
How about this gem, from my engineer Steve Bunkhall, during the Rolex 24 this weekend: (After removing me from the car after 30 minutes in the rain in the middle of the night):

"Well, it took me that long to realize that I had taken out the pro and put you in just in time for it to start pouring rain at 4am, so I figured it was time for a driver change."
Awesome. Love nuts-and-bolts-guys who insist on living in reality.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MiniRacer87
I think I need someone to tell me to "Take my skirt off!"
Be careful what you wish for. Word is JP is only too happy to fill the bill in a pinch. When it's needed, of course.
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  #38  
Old 02-02-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

>>I hate that I havn't seen duck yet this year. I think I need someone to tell me to "Take my skirt off!"<<


You probably haven't heard that Duck "retired" last fall. That's not to say you won't see him at a participating race track near you, but he most likely won't be wearing a Skip Barber shirt. He'll probably be doing stuff with SCCA and the vintage folks. It's a sad deal for me. Duck was one of the guys that really helped me along in my formative years as a racer, but much more so as an instructor. I'll miss him and Sue a lot this year.
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  #39  
Old 02-03-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

A few years ago a T-shirt was done for the mech fund called "25 Years of Bruce'isms". On the back was a collection of some of Bruce MacInness's more noteworthy expressions.

Here is a sampling
  • Stop him! Stop him! He's gonna crash!
  • Like a doberman with a hand grenade
  • Have I told you this before?
  • Low-life sleazeball early apexer
  • This is not good
  • Paranoia is a state of awareness
  • Was there a head in that?
  • True Story
  • What? Do you want to live forever?
  • I had a cocker spaniel like you once
  • A spin is a crash without a noise at the end
  • Kerchunk
  • Put an ambulance in Turn 1
  • Did the office tell you to show up late?
  • If you keep driving like this, in a year you'll have been dead for 364 days
  • I need to do paperwork
  • F.B. = Flowing Brilliance
  • Big Crash! Big Crash!! We're going to have to stop this...oh wait, he's underway
His website has some fun articles, here are some excerpts from one on racing at Bridgehampton:

Bridgehampton was one of the only tracks in the world where one’s talent had to be matched by an equal measure of Testicular Fortitude – You Had to be Brave at this Place.

All who raced there knew that the Earth was flat and ended on the outside of Turn Two in the sand.

Simple spins in the sand have also exacted dramatic personal consequences. Many drivers have experienced several personality changes in the eternity it took to stop without flipping. Some even lowered the center of gravity in their underwear. There were likely several interim stages of terror and relief if one ever tempted fate and spun at the Edge of the Earth in the sand.

On flipping:
All these memorable occasions have led to the two Basic Rules of Flipping, (both of which were invented at Bridgehampton):
1. Don’t close your eyes; you’ll miss the best part.
2. If it gets quiet during the crash, don’t release your seatbelts – You may still be airborne.

We love ya Bruce
.
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Last edited by cdh; 02-03-2008 at 11:14 PM.
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  #40  
Old 02-20-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Jason Holehouse this weekend

"Give me 100 more HP and I'll show you some superior driving".
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  #41  
Old 02-21-2008
TurningLT4Sponsor TurningLT4Sponsor is offline
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

This weekend Bruce made a comment after a big lock up in 17 that it was a "wolfe." Would someone please explain? What comes after "wolfe?"
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  #42  
Old 02-21-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

He probably meant woof.... a term usually used by very small framed male's who work for airlines as a flight attendent.... I hate that word..
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  #43  
Old 02-21-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Woof, Yungah, Kerchunck!

I believe that would be an accurate Brucism......
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  #44  
Old 02-21-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopar92 View Post
He probably meant woof.... a term usually used by very small framed male's who work for airlines as a flight attendent.... I hate that word..
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  #45  
Old 02-22-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

"Downforce is like money. It solves everything." Williams technical director Sam Michael
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  #46  
Old 02-23-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

I don't know, George. Your avatar photo shows a situation where downforce doesn't seem to be solving much of anything . . . . .
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  #47  
Old 02-23-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by George Sladky View Post
"Downforce is like money. It solves everything." Williams technical director Sam Michael
Your signature is a pretty good quote itself, George. Who said that? Sounds to me like Terry, Duck or Stevie De? Of the three, I'll narrow it down to Duck. SD's just as clever, but not as cynical. But, if it was said REALLY fast, then Terry.
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  #48  
Old 02-23-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Just found this thread and .....LOVED EVERY BIT OF IT.....
I have another, totally off racing
" This is my daughter, but she isn't my biagraphical daughter."
I had to handle this face to face ......without laughing.
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  #49  
Old 02-23-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by PFS View Post
Your signature is a pretty good quote itself, George. Who said that? Sounds to me like Terry, Duck or Stevie De? Of the three, I'll narrow it down to Duck. SD's just as clever, but not as cynical. But, if it was said REALLY fast, then Terry.
saw this in another forum, don't think it was one of our illustrious instructors, sounds like it has its origin in NASTYCAR

Understeer is hitting the wall with the front of the car, oversteer is hitting the wall with the rear of the car.
Horsepower is how fast you hit the wall, torque is how far you push wall.

Quote:
Originally Posted by GEORGE View Post
" This is my daughter, but she isn't my biagraphical daughter."
I had to handle this face to face ......without laughing.
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  #50  
Old 02-23-2008
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Re: My collection of racing quotes....

Quote:
Originally Posted by PT Cruiser View Post
I don't know, George. Your avatar photo shows a situation where downforce doesn't seem to be solving much of anything . . . . .
indeed....and this Bruce'ism must have applied to the Aston driver during his flight..........
"2. If it gets quiet during the crash, donít release your seatbelts Ė You may still be airborne"

hang-time and race cars do not go well together at all
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